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In every country on Earth, wedding ceremonies play a significant role. This is no different in Turkey, where the celebration of the union between couples is also of great importance in our culture.
However, there are some key points that differentiate Turkish weddings from other parts of the world: they are incredibly diverse!
In Turkey, weddings have often brought together thousands of people, with entire villages participating and the mentality of "the more people, the better the party" prevailing, in contrast to the more intimate wedding celebrations common in other countries.
In Turkey, the months of August and September have always been the most popular wedding times. The process of a marriage proposal is deeply rooted in tradition, can last for days, and is naturally a grand event!
Especially in rural areas, traditional weddings in Turkey extend over several days and are associated with a long list of customs, traditions, and superstitions that may seem strange to foreign eyes.
Therefore, here is a guide to Turkish wedding rituals:
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In Turkey, as in many other countries, the summer months are considered the optimal time for a wedding, with August and September being the preferred months.
This is especially true when the two most important national and religious holidays, namely the Ramadan Feast, also known as Eid al-Fitr, and the Feast of Sacrifice, or Eid al-Adha, also fall in the summer months, as was the case this year.
There is an age-old superstition that weddings should not take place during the dates between these two holidays, a time called Shawwal, which is the 10th month of the Islamic calendar. However, it turns out that this belief actually has nothing to do with religion and instead stems from a plague that broke out in pre-Islamic times in the Middle East. The enduring superstition is based on the belief that this time of year was cursed and would bring unrest to couples who chose to marry during this period.
In fact, the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.v) married his wife Aisha exactly in this month of Shawwal, and she recommended this time for weddings to other women in her circle.
While this superstition persists in some regions of Turkey to this day, the Turkish religious authority Diyanet confirms that this belief is in no way rooted in religion and that people can celebrate weddings at any time of the year as they see fit.
Nevertheless, as we move past the two Bayram holidays and August and September approach, prepare for the wedding season in the coming weeks.
The Henna Night (in Turkish: Kina gecesi) signifies a "farewell to single life" and the transition to marriage.
The "kına gecesi" or Henna Night is an important ritual rooted in traditions and customs, taking place on the day or two days before the wedding at the bride's house and attended only by women.
For this event, the bride wears a very special red dress or cloak, usually adorned with gold embroidery, called "bindallı." The henna is supposed to be prepared by a happily married woman, and a coin is placed in the dye mixture, whose significance will appear later.
Once the henna is ready, the bride sits in the center on a chair, with a usually red veil over her head, a color that symbolizes love and belonging. The ceremony begins with the oldest female leading the younger women present in a ceremony where they place candles in henna-filled copper bowls and sing around the bride.
The intention is to make the bride cry, and the traditional tear-jerking song "Yüksek yüksek tepeler," a song about longing for family and home, usually does the trick. Once the bride bursts into tears, it's time to start dyeing the henna.
The eldest in the family has the task of placing a dab of henna in the bride's palm, but first, the mother-in-law must place a gold coin in her hand, which is supposed to bring good luck. In fact, the bride is supposed to keep her fist closed until she does. When the henna is applied, the bride's hands are wrapped in a red cloth, and the remaining guests also receive henna markings from the copper bowls that were passed around.
According to superstition, the person who finds the coin in the henna bowl, as mentioned earlier, will soon receive a marriage proposal. After the henna ceremony, the event continues similar to western "bachelorette parties" with food, dancing, and merriment among women for the hostess and the upcoming wedding of the bride.
The belief behind the tradition is to ensure that the couple has lifelong love and is protected from misfortune. Sources link this ancient practice in these countries to the story that also inspired the Feast of Sacrifice, with henna representing a sacrifice.
This habit is not only associated with parties but comes from the tradition of burning henna, which supposedly protects couples from harm and fosters their devotion to each other. Both the bride and the wedding guests will wear elaborate henna tattoos on their hands.
The ceremony is still predominantly female and is mainly carried out by the bride and her friends.
Another unusual feature of the henna night is that although it is a pleasant occasion, it also has a touch of sadness and often shows the bride crying as she realizes she is leaving one lifestyle and entering another.
The groom also participates in a "flag-planting" ceremony that takes place at dawn, marking the beginning of the entire wedding event. According to tradition, male members of the wedding party participate in a dawn prayer ceremony and then raise a flag at the highest point near the couple's home. Practically all these events are accompanied by "davul and zurna," traditional Turkish instruments. The musicians are tasked with providing the musical framework for each event.
In traditional Turkish weddings, drums and flutes are used. These instruments are called Davuls and Zurna. Nowadays, instruments are still part of the wedding tradition.
A traditional Turkish wedding, especially in rural areas, also involves separate parties for the families of the bride and groom. These wedding parties typically feature the most traditional dish, "keşkek," a stew-like dish made from wheat, barley, and chicken, served at special ceremonies in Turkey. It is such an integral part of Turkish culture that it was inscribed on UNESCO's Intangible Cultural Heritage list in 2011.
The dish is meticulously prepared by the groom and his friends who grind it in the days leading up to the wedding.
Perhaps the most exciting wedding tradition in Turkey is bringing the bride from her parents' home to her marital home on a horse, accompanied by a lively procession and the waving of a Turkish flag presented to the groom upon her arrival. Nowadays, some couples also decorate cars.
Usually, in a traditional Turkish wedding, the groom comes to the bride's house to take her to the celebration, while family and friends "give her away." She usually arrives in a flower-decorated car. Often, the groom has to knock on the door several times because the bride's family "doesn't want to give her away." In some traditions, the groom has to "bribe" the children holding the door closed with coins or candies.
Organizing a wedding in Turkey involves numerous details and steps to ensure everything goes smoothly. Here's an overview of the different aspects to consider when planning and executing a wedding in Turkey: Read More
This tradition dates back to a time when horses were massively used by the population. Nowadays, a wedding car convoy follows the bridal car, driving in a row through the village or town. People also honk as part of the procession. When the car stops, children go onto the street and ask for money from the bride and groom, and the bride and groom usually put small amounts in envelopes to distribute to the children.
Turkey has developed a number of newer customs, often adopted from other cultures, such as the groom not being allowed to see his bride in her wedding dress before the wedding, as it is said to bring bad luck.
One of the most prominent superstitions associated with the moment after the "I dos" concerns who steps on whose feet first. Allegedly, the one who steps first will be the one who has the last word in the marriage.
In addition to the bouquet toss, a Turkish wedding offers a variety of opportunities for female members of the wedding party to be next in line to get married.
One such tradition is the practice of writing the names of all unmarried women in the wedding party on the sole of the bride's shoe. According to superstition, the first name to wear off will soon marry.
Another folklore tradition in Turkey is adorning the bride with threads of glittering tinsel known as "gelin teli". Her friends then pick out the tinsel to find the shortest piece, as the one who finds it is said to be next in line to marry.
Halay is a Turkish folk dance specifically designed for weddings. The celebration forms a circle with a melody that starts slowly and then gradually speeds up, with people dancing together holding hands or fingers.
Each region has different traditions with Halay dances, but dance is represented in all weddings.
In Turkey, gold and banknotes are the main wedding gifts, and there is usually even a ceremony after the official celebration. The bride and groom wear ribbons, and guests take turns to take photos with them and attach gold or money to the ribbons. This money is then used to help the couple start their new life, whether for building a house or other needs.
Organizing a wedding in Turkey involves numerous details and steps to ensure everything goes smoothly. Here's an overview of the different aspects to consider when planning and executing a wedding in Turkey:
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